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voices within...

some feelings can be express easily, some feelings can only be expressed in writing...

 

the love of God

had an interesting cell meeting last night. interesting as in there are a lot of distractions. baby Serene just can't stop talking, wonder around, some cell members talk to each other on their own, i really felt discourage. i ask myself, how can i keep control of the situation, seems like everyone is there but not there! how to keep them focus? i can't be telling Thomas & Vivian not to bring Serene to cell, since she is one of the major disctraction. how, how, how? i really don't know what to do.
towards the end of cell, Elmery shared something that really encouraged me. she said, from her observation of Serene, she just comes to you, play and hug you without any purpose or reason, she just wants to do that. God would also like us to do that, just go to Him, without purpose or reason, to spent time with Him. another thing that she also mentioned is that when Serene is about to fall, many pairs of hands will be there, ready to catch her. just like how God is in protection of us. when we are about to fall, He will be there to catch us. sometimes He let go, so that we can learn from our 'falls'. just like how parents would do to let their children fall in order for them to learn learn. that really reminded me the love that God has for us! i text Elmery to let her know that i was encouraged by what she shared, she said that she thought no one is listening!
many times i think we are too stingy with our words in terms of encouraging and commenting people, as if by doing so will cost us our fortune or our life. not knowing by doing so sometimes, will really help pull someone up, it might just be the thing that they want to hear! i am guilty of it myself. need to learn to be more generous in this.
how about you?

 
 

frustrations in life

there are many things in life that are frustrating. i for one gets frustrated quite easily i must say. my patient level i guess must be lower compare to many others. why do we get frustrated? things that we want done, are not done? things we expect people to do, they don't do not because they forgot but the don't know. things are not done to our expectations? we get frustrated as well.
i was frustrated when i got back to work on monday, so many things needed to be done. big and small, all waiting for me to attend to. before i even manage to seat down, people got upset with me because the things that they wanted was not done and they are on the way to collect it all the way from where they stay. sometimes things are not as simple as they think they are, but they just don't care but to insist on it. i felt so harrassed! Finally, i broke down, i cried, out of stress, out of frustrations. i kept it to myself, that didn't really help. i got my friends worried, which is not really fair to them. i am really sorry gals!
being an introvert, i needed time by myself. i didn't really talk to anyone, cancelled the movie appointment. i went home and close myself at home, slept at 9pm! and lo and behold, today i feel good! back to my normal self again! i am ok now gals, sorry for worrying you gals. thanks for all your love an care.....

 
 

spirit controlled temperaments

just completed the 3 half-days Tungling class on spirit controlled temperaments. this class has really blessed me, and help me to know why people behave like they do, and how to relate to them. the lecturer, Beng is really a great teacher and fun too. he uses games and activities to help us to understand the things that he teaches.
on the first day, we did the test. and guess what, i am a phleg! and my secondary is melancholy. Fi thought that i am a sanguine, and many think that i am a choleric. i too was surprise at my result! when i first got the result, i really don't understand why i am a phleg? after his explanations, and descriptions of the behavior of each temperament, i now understand and agree that i am a phleg. one of the activities he done, where he grouped us in our core temperament and have us do a project to design a t-shirt. its really interesting to see the whole process of the project. Beng was walking around to check on us, was laughing as he see how we behave.
on the last day of class, Beng thought us how to deal with and handle people of different temperaments and even within the same temperaments. it's really interesting, he broke it down to words to say, body gestures, dos and don'ts and other areas to look out for. he also showed us how God and Jesus handled people of the different kinds of temperaments in the bible. It's interesting to find that 69% of the population of the world are phleg. can't imagine if majority are choleric, or sanguine or even melancholy, it will really be a nightmare...
God is just so amazing and wise, to have created us the way we are, beyond our imagination. well, who are we to know anyway......